Thursday, December 22, 2016

Two is Enough

I've had this topic in my heart strings the last couple of months, and now it's time to spew it out. Okay, not really. The truth is, I am finally in front of a computer, two kids are sleeping, and I am uploading all my pictures to get them organized, and I'm bored. So I thought I would post.

Let's talk about kids.

I had an experience a couple months ago that kind of put me in a weird place.  I was at a mom's group (about 80 of us), and we were playing a game. All the ladies stand in two rows facing each other. The announcer will say something like "Stay if you prefer mountain, switch if you prefer beaches". And you do just that. It's a little chaotic, but you get to see the women who have something in common with you.

Well, one of the last ones was:
"Switch sides if you have more than one child"
Everyone switched.

"Switch sides if you have more than two children"
98% of the women switched.

"Switch sides if you have more than three children"
Still a lot, but not as much switched, maybe about half.

"Switch sides if you have more than four children"
At this point only two women switched sides (which was a little surprising).

"Switch sides if you have more than five children"
At this point only one woman switched sides.

And guess what happened?
Everyone in the room applauded, high fived and shook their heads saying "how does she do it?"!

Now don't get my wrong. I was quite impressed. Really. Because five is a crap load of kids. I can't imagine.

BUT, then I got to thinking...where is my applaud? Selfish right? But stay with me....
It's pretty "normal" to have one kid. And "normal" to have two. Anything more than that is incredibly difficult.

BUT WHAT IF....what if...

MY two is equal to YOUR five?

Now I am not expecting a parade of sorts, but I think our mom mob needs to understand that EVERY mom out there is dealing with their own battles. There isn't a 'worse' situation than another. Or a better situation than another. It's all hard. And sometimes it all sucks. Whether you have one kid to yell to put on shoes, or five.  One kid you have to negotiate eating dinner, or five. It is all the same.

We are all getting little sleep, living off coffee, barely think straight, keeping everyone's schedules but our own, showering mid day, barely getting work out in, MOMS.

Let's remember that---K?


PS: Seriously though, High Five to moms with lots of kids. Because two is enough for me.

Tuesday, December 13, 2016

Christmas Card 2016

It's that time of year for the obligatory update which is Christmas. The time when I apologize for not updating things in the last 6 months. The time of year where things are festive and bright, and I am running around getting everything finished up.

Life has been good since the last post six (*ahem*) months ago. Call it lazy. Call it being busy.  Nah, it's lazy. Blogging is the LAST thing I want to do, and for anyone who knows me, I have been having a hellva lot of things going to to have blogging be on the list. BUT, it's Christmas, and I printed on our card for "online Christmas card..." So I should probably at least stay true to myself, and all my people who will be reading this post. 


Still working from home and loving every second of being here. Morning breakfast and lunch dates. Lately I have been able to feed and get the girls to nap time before he is up for lunch, so we ACTUALLY have lunch dates alone together.
Still hunting. Still woodworking. Still being amazing husband and dad.  Works really hard to make sure his girls are happy, and is always getting us out for a spontaneous adventure.

Busy. Busy. Busy. Busy. Did I say busy?

New things: 
  • I have started going to South Mountain Community Church in Lehi. 
  • Women's bible class on Monday night which has been absolutely life changing. 
  • MOPS, but I am now attending in Draper instead of Salt Lake.
  • Bikram Yoga. Although I went for a couple weeks and had to stop because my pass expired, I fully plan on getting back at it in the New Year.
  • Sewing and creating! I even opened a new Instagram for my things (@messyquilts). Don't ask me how I have time for that!
  • Getting Lillie to school on Tuesday and Thursday.
Same things:
  • Wifey, Mama...Duh.
  • Bookkeeping for Jeremy and go into the office when I can.
  • Connecting with friends as much as possible!


Sweet. Sensitive. Loving. Cares SO much for others. Such a big girl! Turned three over the summer and started PRE preschool in August.  Mike and I weren't really that sure about putting her in since she was the youngest in her class. BUT, just WOW. She's grown so much so fast. Her vocabulary, her questions and just her personality. I am beginning to realize that she is becoming a little girl and the baby stage is just leaving us as quickly as it came.


My. Fireball. Zesty. Fast. Determined. Lovable. I was trying to come up with how she is, but I think this picture really shows what she's all about. On. The. Go. Busy. and SILLY. 18 months and not saying may words yet. Sure is trying, but not quite getting it. Still has a binky, which I say is JUST fine. She's my baby, she can take it to college. 

The Messerly family is doing VERY well. Mike and I have been able to spend a lot of date nights together recently which has been the one thing that I have needed. We constantly talk about how blessed our life is, well, because it is. Do we have hard days? Bad days? ROUGH days? Boring days? Sure. Who doesn't? But overall, we are doing well. We are excited to see what the next chapter of life gives us.

Merry Christmas!

Saturday, April 16, 2016

April 16

April 16. 

This day is hard for me. And will always be hard for me.

Today marks ten years since the motorcycle accident. That's really tough to say. It's all happened so fast, and yet, I it feels like yesterday. Totally cliche right? 

I knew this big "ten year" was coming up. I feel like each year that goes by, it loses significance of what happened. There are parts of me that wish I could go back to the "one year" just to relive the freshness of what happened.

Over the last ten years a lot has happened. Divorce, graduate from college, married again, two babies(!) Which, side note, the night this happened, Kurt told me to finish school. And when I did 4 years later, I couldn't help but think of him. 

 I can honestly say that thinking about Kurts family has never ever changed. Every holiday and every year I think about the two girls he left behind. I can't even begin to imagine how hard that is for them. He left SO young.

I took a chance today and contacted one of his daughters. I found her on a whim online. I don't know what prompted me to message her. But I did. And the result was difficult. Not anything I was prepared for, but I managed and made it through.

I have always felt connected to his can I not?! I. Was. There. I was on the bike. I was saved. Do you think that is easy for me?! I have to live with the understanding that he left a family behind. 

All I have ever wanted is peace for their family. From the very moment of day  one to ten years later. I will never forget what Kurt did for me. 

He saved my life. 

And I hope one day his family understands. I can't imagine the torture you deal with, but I've dealt with my own.

So...April 16.

 You will always be with me.